Hidden Secret Love
by Sk8er-Neko
Summary: Ren X Yoh fluff one-shot. Ren have feelings for Yoh and fears Yoh might reject him and little he knows, Yoh feels the same way too. Will they confess or was it too late? R & R please! NO FLAMES ALLOWED! 3 songs inside!


Author: I'm alive still!!!! I just went in to a break and vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyyy llllllllllooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnngggggggg break! But never mind! What matters is I have an idea for a new Ren X Yoh fluff and here it is!!!!

Ren: Glad you came back...

Yoh: Yeah!!!

Author: THANK YOU!!!!

_**Warning/s:**_ **_shounen ai, Ren X Yoh cuteness and OOCness_**

**_Note/s:_**

1.) blah - Yoh's POV

2.) **blah-** Ren's POV

3.) **blah-** both Ren and Yoh's POV

4.) _blah- song_

**Please read and review!!!!**

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****REN'S **POV** (Song: Love Just Is by: Hilary Duff)**

**I looked up and saw snow falling gently from the sky.**

**It was one of those wintery days again. When chilly air rising and the snow is tickling people's noses. When all the trees are still bare and my friend beside me is slightly complaining.**

**"It's really freezing out here, Ren...," he said in a shaky voice.**

**It was him again.**

**Asakura Yoh the naive idiot...**

**Yet the one I love the most...**

**I nearly laughed at myself. How ironic sometimes love was... I knew he was a stupid naive idiot but I love him. I love him since he taught me how to love. And I don't know if I have the courage to say that in front of him. That's why I should keep it a secret. He could never love me back.**

**"Baka," I said, "you wouldn't be too cold if you have brought your gloves..."**

**"Hehe," he chuckled, "guess I shoud never forget that again..."**

**You might think this is a date or anything like that. Like I said before, my love for his should be kept a secret. This is not a date. I only volunteer to come with him to grocery. I always volunteer so I could spend time with just two of us.**

_**But that wouldn't last long...**_

**"It was really freezing!!!!" Yoh complained again, rubbing his bare hands together.**

**"Give me your hands..," I offered, stretching out my gloved hand.**

**Yoh looked at me in a puzzled way but obliged anyway, stretching out his hands to meet mine. As soon as I have his hand, I began rubbing it. Yoh was still staring at me, dazed. I blew in his hands and he blushed cutely.**

_**I would really miss that blush...**_

**"Better?" I asked.**

**Still with that rosy cheeks, he nodded. We started walking again. We've been silent for minutes and neither of us are willing to break the silence.**

_When the night won't fall  
And the sun won't rise  
And you see the best as you close your eyes  
When you reach the top as you bottom out  
But you understand what it's all about  
_**  
As the snow falls, silence dominated all the noises. Even that I was so desperate to break the silence, I didn't dared to. Neither of us dared to. However, in a few minutes, desperation seems to get in to Yoh.**

**"So, how's life going?" Yoh asked, looking away from me.**_**  
**__  
Nothing's ever what it seems  
In your life or in your dreams  
It don't make sense what can you do  
So I won't try makin' sense of you  
__**  
Oh, Yoh, **_**I thought, **_**I've been pining over you. I wanted to say this to you but I have a fear that you might regret me.**_

**But instead I said, "not really much going on. Horohoro is being a plack and your fiancee started on me again."**

**He chuckled. He chuckled that mellow chuckle of his. I adored that very much. I can't understand why people are getting irritated by his giggles and laughs. It was so bright and cheery that it can even get rid of the dark cloud in people's hearts.**_**  
**__  
Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... in you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for  
Love just is..  
_**  
"That good, huh?" he said, "you really need to get on with people. Everybody thinks you're anti-social."**

**"Maybe, I am," I said.**_**  
**__  
When you ask to stay, and then disappear  
It seems you're gone, but you're really here  
When every move seems out of place  
But every kiss is filled with grace  
_**  
Yoh chuckled. The kind when it will just melt a big part of my icy heart and will turn it into a warm one.**

**"Sometimes you can be so ironic, Tao Ren," Yoh said, stiffling his chuckles, "of course you are not an anti-social person. In fact, you are very warm."**

**I blushed and I swear that will be the last time he will see me blush.**

_Some things never get defined  
In your heart or in your mind  
It don't make sense what can you do  
So I won't try makin' sense of you  
_**  
At long last, we are in the grocery shop. There are a lot of people in there. Some of them are families and some are them are couples.Just another typical day in the grocery store.**_** I must remember this day or else, I might never remember it at all.**_

**Yoh grabbed a basket and gestured me to move on.**_**  
**__  
Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... in you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for  
Love just is  
_**  
"Ren?" Yoh suddenly called. I looked at him.**

**"What?"**

**"Do you ever loved someone?" Yoh asked.**

**I was quite shocked to say the least. Why would Yoh bring up a subject like that in a public place? Why he asked me so suddenly? Guess I'll never know. This is Yoh I'm talking to. Sometimes his words that came out of his mouth can be so confusing.**

**"I dunno," I said, "I love my family but that's my family, and I love my friends, even if you consider that snow-baka my friend."**

**Yoh chuckled. He might be remembering the times when me and Horohoro couldn't just get along. It amuses him a lot.**_**  
**__  
Don't ever ask me for reasons  
I can't give to you  
Don't ever ask me for reasons  
Why I live for you  
I just do  
I just do  
_**  
"But..," Yoh said, "did you love someone as in you know, **_**love**_**?"**

**"I dunno," I said, quite coldly," I mean, I like this friend of mine. Who is naive, kind and hard-working when the friends are in need."**

**"Oh," Yoh said.**

**I looked at him and he seems quite distressed. I couldn't understand this change of emotion. This never happened before. It only happened today.**

_What did I do...?  
Nothing's ever what it seems  
In your life or in your dreams  
It don't make sense what can you do  
So I won't try makin' sense of you  
_**  
"C'mon, let's get on with this grocery or else Anna will kill us," Yoh said, speeding up.**

**I couldn't do nothing but to nod.**_**  
**__  
Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for  
Love just is...  
Love just is...  
_  
YOH'S_POV_** (Song: Singled Out by: A-Teens)**

Ren looked at me with concerned eyes from my behind. He looked so concerned for me. I don't know why he looked at me like that.

He just told me that he loved someone. That make my heart break to say the least. Nothing could break my heart more than hearing that from Ren.

Tao Ren...

The most unpredictable friend that I ever have...

The most hot-tempered guy I've ever met...

Yet...

He is the one who admired me for so long...

I know what are you thinking now... You'll probably think that I'm some sort of a digusting person loving another guy. However, this is love. And it was very unavoidable. There is nothing wrong with it.

But for Tao Ren..., he'll probably think it is wrong.

That's why I don't want him to know... I don't want him to feel disgusted around me. I don't want to lose and if I do..., I'll never ever forgive myself.

_Never..._

Anyway, I will never have a chance about saying my feelings for him. He already love someone. And probably someone much better than me. Maybe he deserves it. This person might be a good choice for him. He won't love an idiot who always slacks around.

I have to get over this. It won't take a really long time won't it? To get over heartbreaking feelings? To get over Tao Ren? I don't know either...

_Maybe..., it was wrong to love Tao Ren..._

_When I wake up in the morning  
Before I style my hair  
The first thing on my mind  
Is I hope he cares  
_  
"Hey," Ren's voice cut me off in a trance. I whipped around to look at him.

"You are very quiet...," Ren said simply.

I put on one of my goofy grins and try to smile warmly at Ren. I still have to smile warmly or else I can't get over him.

"I must have dazed off," I said simply before going back into walking._  
__  
Every single evening  
Before I hit my bed  
My mind analyses  
Every word she said  
_  
Damn it, he nearly recognize my discomfort. I have to act like I am. I can't act differently or else he will notice that I'm acting very strangely.

I looked back at him. He have that look at his face again when he notices something. He might be thinking what is up with me. I must distract him._  
__  
It seems like everybody's got someone  
A hand to hold  
And a soul to touch  
Why were you so much?_

"So...," I said, "who is this person you loved?"_  
__  
I can get you, I can get you  
I can't get you off my mind  
When I'm with you I know could  
Love you 'til the end of time  
I can get you, I can get you  
If you could just tell me how  
Cuz with all this love around  
And me without you I feel so singled out  
_  
He looked puzzled.

"Why?" he asked._  
__  
If I only had the courage  
To open up my heart  
Would he run? Would he hide?  
Would it light a spark?  
_  
"Nothing," I grinned, "I was just interested..."_  
__  
Should I walk up to her?  
Should I throw a charming smile?  
Should I say that her eyes  
Light up my sky?  
_  
He seems irritated when I bring up that subject. I hope he is not angry.

"Well," he started, "this person is very naive and unaware of the surroundings. This person always get into trouble and seems relaxed after a mayhem..."

I stared at him, getting interested now._  
__  
Seems like everybody's got someone  
A hand to hold and a heart to touch  
I wanted oh so much  
_  
"... this person is not the type of person who mentions negatives all the time. This person really tried to be positive around the clock. Everyone was happy to be with this person..."

Suddenly, I could clearly see why Ren liked this person. Positive things are coming out of his mouth. That could only mean one thing..._  
__  
I can get you, I can get you  
I can't get you off my mind  
When I'm with you  
I know I could  
Love you 'til the end of time  
I can get you, I can get you  
If you could just tell me how  
Cuz with all this love around  
And me without you  
I feel so singled out  
__  
He really love this person...  
__  
Every single day I see these couples walking by  
And if I took a chance maybe I could be one of them  
If only I could have you as the one  
The hands that I could hold, the soul to touch  
The heart that I could trust  
_  
"...it will be a great loss if this person leaves us. That's why I love this person. This person is the only one who could melt my icy heart. This person really trying to be hard-working when this person's mission would be cheering up the person's friends. This person also go easy on it's enemies and tries to be friends with them. This person was so extraordinary..."_  
__  
I can get you, I can get you  
I can't get you off my mind  
_  
That's it...

_I couldn't take this anymore...  
__  
I can get you, I can get you  
I can't get you off my mind  
When I'm with you  
I know I could  
Love you 'til the end of time  
I can get you, I can get you  
If you could just tell me how  
Cuz with all this love around  
And me without you  
I feel so singled out _

This move might be very lame but I broke into a run.

I couldn't take this anymore. My heart will break into pieces if I hear those words of love from Tao Ren. I just couldn't take this. It feels like there's nothing more hurting than this. 

I just run, not bothering to look at Ren cause...

Just because...

_I can get you, I can get you  
I can't get you off my mind  
When I'm with you  
I know I could  
Love you 'til the end of time  
I can get you, I can get you  
If you could just tell me how  
Cuz with all this love around  
And me without you  
I feel so singled out  
_  
I can't bear to be hurted anymore..._  
__  
I feel so singled out _

**BOTH REN AND YOH'S **POV** (Song: Firefly by A-Teens)**

**What did I do wrong? Why he ran away like that? Didn't he realised that I'm describing about him? I need him to realise that I love him... Or else..., I wouldn't have a chance to say anything to him anymore.**

**I sighed.**

**I decided to go back to the Asakura residence and do what I was meant to do and hopefully, keep Yoh out of my mind because I think there is no need to him how much I loved him.**

_When I said go I never meant away  
You ought to know the freaky games we play  
Could you forgive and learn how to forget  
Hear me as I'm calling out your name  
_  
I felt so stupid and lame...

I run off like that with no good reason. Sometimes, I ponder about the times when I was such being a girl. No wonder Ren doesn't like me that much.

He could never like me...

I guess I have to get over it and continue my life..

Slowly, I walk home.__

Firefly come back to me  
Make the night as bright as day  
I'll be looking out for you  
Tell me that your lonely too  
Firefly come lead me on  
Follow you into the sun  
That's the way it ought to be  
Firefly come back to me  
**  
It was getting late and Yoh still didn't turn up. I wonder what happened to him now. I hope he didn't get himself hurt.**

**What if he DID get himself hurt?**

**What if he just broke a bone or something? What if he got hit by a car? It was all my fault! It was my responsibility if something bad happens to him. I don't want him to get hurt that much. It will hurt me too.**

**I reached for my coat and put it on.**

**I have to find him. I will not calm down unless if I knew he was fine. But he wasn't even here yet so how will I know?!?**

**I reached for the door and open it...**

**Just in time to meet the brown orbs of my admiration.**__

You and me  
We shared a mystery  
We were so close  
Like honey to the bee  
And if you tell me how to make you understand  
I'm minor in a major kinda way  
  
"Yoh...," he mused.

He sounds very urgent and concerned. I'm confused. Why he looked so worried?

"Ren...," I mused back.

He breathe in deeply and lunged at me. He was flailing his arms around me and pulled me in a tight embrace. It feels soo good when you are in your crush's arms.

I am really confused...

"Thank God you're OK," Ren whispered in my ear.

I did nothing but to embrace back.__

Firefly come back to me  
Make the night as bright as day  
I'll be looking out for you  
Tell me that your lonely too  
Firefly come lead me on  
Follow you into the sun  
That's the way it ought to be  
Firefly come back to me  
**  
"Ren...," he said, "you can let go now."**

**I let him go and we stared into each other's eyes. There is something in me that have been wanting to burst for days or weeks or maybe months. And this warm feeling are making it worst.**

**"You scared me," I murmured, "I thought I would never see you before I go."**

**"Go?" Yoh asked, puzzled.**

**I did not want that to slip...**

**"Yoh," I started, "I have to tell you something..., I'm going back to China and I will be there for 5 years or maybe more..."**

**I saw Yoh eye's pained for a moment. What is the meaning of this?**

**"...I have to go or else my father will get angry..."**

**Yoh is sobbing now. Oh, just great Ren..., you just made him cry. But at the same time I was startled.**

**"Yoh?" I callled out softly.**__

Fly firefly through the sky  
Come and play with my desire  
Don't be long don't ask why  
I can't wait another night

I'm feeling incredibly stupid now.

First, I ran away from him and then, crying this time. However, Ren was leaving me and I have to burst my emotions out. I can bear people leaving me but this is Ren and not some random person.

I can't hold on anymore...

"And one thing," Ren's voice made me listen, "there is also one thing..."

I looked up at him and hopefully he will say the words I was dying to hear.

_Firefly come back to me  
Make the night as bright as day  
I'll be looking out for you  
Tell me that your lonely too  
Firefly come lead me on  
Follow you into the sun  
That's the way it ought to be  
Firefly come back to me  
_**  
"Yoh," I started, "I love you..., from the bottom of my heart..."**

**His eyes widened and froze there in shock. Maybe it's not a good thing saying it at all. Maybe, it really disgusts him.**

**Filled with pain, I turned to leave.**

**I was walking on a street when hurrying footsteps can be heard behind me. Arms hugged by neck and warmth engulfed me.**

**"I love you too...," a voice murmured.**

**I think I don't need to see who it is...**__

Firefly come back to me  
Make the night as bright as day  
I'll be looking out for you  
Tell me that your lonely too  
Firefly come lead me on  
Follow you into the sun  
That's the way it ought to be  
Firefly come back to me  
  
He certainly didn't need to guess who I am...

**No, I don't need to feel what is this feeling...**

**Because we already feel the same way with each other...**

**_OWARI_**

**_

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_**Author: Did ya like it? Please inform me and no flames because they just a nuisance!!! Say reviews nicely and I'll give you cookies!!! Have a sugar rush and have diabetes happy!!!

PLEASE REVIEW!!!!


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